Schmoozing

The other night I got invited to a soiree in SoHo sponsored by Inc. Magazine. It was billed as a networking event for small business people. I showed up not knowing what to expect only to find myself in a room jam-packed with self-described millionaires.

These were entrepreneurs with hedge funds in Greenwich and on Wall Street, luxury real estate companies in Montreal, investment banks in California – you name it. Right away, I wanted to crawl under the buffet table. What was I doing there amongst all these uber successful people who had come to hear an expert speak on “thriving during times of adversity?” I am just a blogger for Christ’s sakes! I nursed a glass of Pinot Grigio, had a little Hor d’oeuvre, and hightailed it down to the conference hall to wait for the speech from the guest of honor. I think I may have even been shaking a little, I was so traumatized. (I have always been painfully shy, inhibited and overly sensitive. It's just one of my things.)

If you are a small business owner, never do what I did. I was never a schmoozer, or social butterfly and it is probably one of the biggest impediments I have in business. Schmoozing is seriouly anathema to who I am, I'm not kidding. But I am going to say this: Small business people need to know how to schmooze. For those like me who are so shy and intimidated by these large social gatherings, maybe it is going to mean schmoozing with a purpose on a more micro scale. I can schmooze one on one. I can schmooze with a small group. If I must. I think the purpose of schmoozing is to make contacts, to network. And the purpose of networking is to get leads that probably lead to you and the other person to making a profit somewhere down the chain due to your association and affiliation with each other.

With that in mind, a small business person who is not good at the large-group schmoozing (my hand is in the air) has to think of ways to do it on a micro scale. When you meet people in any setting, always think: How can this person and I help each other? Always exchange business cards (make sure you have nice ones made up). And follow up as soon as possible by emailing or calling the person, maybe have drinks after work, as a way of getting to know them, rather than just keeping the card in the rolodex.

Sometimes, it’s not the quantity of people you are standing in a room with. It’s the quality of the connection you actually make at the end of the meeting. That is what I think adds value to the small business at the end of the day.